Archive for the ‘JJ&Sons’ Category

Hungover much?

March 29, 2009

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This post is brought to you courtesy of Tony Tang’s inspired $33 special on Jamesons, and dedicated to the angry “come back here and i’ll give you thanks very much…” lady from the free ride.

Anyway, here’s 5 instrumental tracks to bump when loud noises hurt your brain, and everything is a bit blurry… plus an El-P track that slipped in by accident, but shit, you can never have enough of the Producto.

1. Mass Transit – Capitol D and the Molemen.

2. International Hustler (instrumental) – Connie Price & The Keystones

3. Mu-Getsu – DJ Krush & Toshinori Kondo

4. Cassava: Nokea – DJ/rupture

5. Bring the Ruckus – El Michels Affair

Bonus: Tasmanian Pain Coaster – El-P

Here you go.

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10 quick facts about St Patrick and his eponimous day…

March 16, 2009
  • St Patrick is rumoured to be buried near the town of Downpatrick, which is some admirably straight talking.
  • The man himself actually preferred the colour Blue, preferring to quench his thirst from a hard day doing saintly shit, with a tall glass of blue curacao while listening to Below the Heavens.
  • The reason it changed to green was due to the symbolism of the shamrock (a traditionally green leaf), and the fact that when wandering drunk in a field, one tends to fall over and end up covered in green. Similar situation when vomiting on yourself after eating pesto.

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Statistical analysis of NOTR blog’s potential future.

February 2, 2009

After much complex mathematical thinkin’ n shit, I have put together this marble pie chart to represent the possible future content of this blog. Do the knowledge, as there will be a quiz at the end of class.

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21% Incoherent ranting after drinking too much Jamison’s and posting late at night.

10% more posts written about Barack Obama after I watch too much West Wing and start channeling Toby Ziegler.

6% the amount of post’s on this blog that will actually be posted by me.

10% more blogness?

7% the percentage of comments left by people we don’t’ actually know.

7% the amount of content in my posts that is actually Jay-Z lyrics.

8% comical internet claptrap found whilst looking for pr0n.

7% more serious political, social and artistic blog commentary. Maybe.

10% percentage of bandwidth used up by either myself or Dubbs when posting YouTube videos relating to Lil Wayne, Obama or repeated posting of “man gets kicked in nuts by donkey video”.

7% more free candy.

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8% more pictures of this horse.

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What more can I say? Get it?

Everything is A-O-K…

December 24, 2008

Andrew O’Keefe used to be a lawyer, and is the son of a former Supreme Court Judge called Barry, and yes, his uncle was that Johnny O’Keefe.

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O’Keefe is the Seven Network’s poster-boy these days, he’s been groomed to be their star host, ala Rove “i’m way too familiar with your mum” McManus and Eddie “absolutely no conflict of interest” Mcguire.

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andrew: i’m going to get so hammered at Boogs’ set tonight…

eddie: i’m a massive bogan…

rove: oh my god… why is he touching me…

He started out on the sketch comedy show Big Bite, in 2003, he began hosting the game show Deal or No Deal. As well as co-hosting Weekend Sunrise, In 2007 O’Keefe also became the host of the The Rich List… what ties all these programs together, aside from O’Keefe, is they’re all very boring.

In 2004, O’Keefe was nominated for a Logie Award for “Most Popular New Male Talent” and again for “Most Popular Presenter” in ’05 and ’06.

Revolver Upstairs is one of the few decent spots on the infamous south-side of the river.

This is what happens when the son of a Supreme Court Judge gets smashed outside Revolver.

He’s laying on the sidewalk, talking kiwi-fruit and the merits of farming it… he falls on a chick… smokes weed (allegedly)… he whistles some locals up… he goes home with someone random.

The very next day he was back at work.

NOTR salutes Andrew O’Keefe, because we’ve all been there.

And really, that’s what this is all about, because O’Keefe didn’t really do anything wrong. Yes he was drunk, but he was neither abusive or violent, he didn’t hurt anybody and in fact, he seemed like reasonably good company in his more lucid moments. It didn’t help that Seven attempted to pay a bouncer $25,000 “hush” money, because in this day and age, all that means is that a different Network will pay more for the exclusive.

The whole world is up in arms every time a potential “role model” misbehaves (no Ben Cousins), and the transparently smug, “expose” style intro the Nine Network guy gives the piece is indicative of the way that this attitude of expectation is being manipulated by “current affairs” programs and the moral majority.

Celebrities are people just like us, except way more talented and famous, why not let the stars drink and be merry… ’tis the season after all.

On the other hand there’s this little nugget…

Who’s lookin out for the kids?

November 25, 2008

Just to put the randomness of this story in perspective, these are the first images you get if you google:

“drunk 12 year old victoria australia”

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It’s true, there’s few things as iconic as a lazy red kangaroo with a super-imposed nondescript beer, but lets get back to the subject.

What the fk is up with a 12 year old girl having skills like that?

Not only did she achieve a certified high score on the breathometer, but shit, she also drove the car, and skipped her Court appearance.

There’s a police dragnet out as we speak blog, for this pre-teen dynamo.

While NOTR by no means condones the activities of this young lady, we do ask that you consider, for a moment, the situation that the hard-working, diligent, Victorian police officer found him/herself in.

COP: Hello ma’m, just a random breath-test. can i see your license and registration please?

12 YEAR OLD GIRL: Oh, where am i? Car’s are funny, can i have a Breezer?

COP: License and registration please?

12 YEAR OLD GIRL: What’s a license, i don’t smoke? Did you hear about Dave and Megan? She’s such a slut.

COP: Can you please step out of the car ma’m?

12 YEAR OLD GIRL: My mum told me not to talk to strangers…

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If only the police had invited her to a Facebook party, next to the Village Cinemas at QV, she would have been there for sure…

Drink responsibly friends, and for god sake don’t send your little sister out for booze, she may just ‘jack a car and go on the run… with your booze.

Who’s coming to the show with me?

October 12, 2008

Kanye West

Glow in the Dark tour Mr West! Mr West!

“Yes that’s right lovers of rap, hip-hop, pop, rock, hell just music in general, valedictorian Mr Kanye West returns to Australia to share the good life!

Arguably the most important creative force in hip-hop music today, Kanye is in a class of his own. Building the future of hip-hop as he digs back in time with his unique ear for samples, connecting the past with the present in a brand new way. Enrolling for world domination in 2004 – no matter where you lived, if you owned a radio, a TV, a computer or were simply taking a walk to the canteen, Kanye West broke into your music consciousness with his first album, The College Dropout.

Class mate to Kanye will be special guest Nas and kicking off the night’s proceedings will be New Zealand’s own hip-hop A-Grade Student, Scribe! Don’t miss the graduation night of 2008.” – Ticketek.com

….hmmm.

I’m not sure, i think i’m a lover of rap, hip-hop, pop, rock, hell just music in general… but do i need ‘Yeezy to share his good life with me?

(oh yeah, we embed that shit now)

Overblown extended school metaphors aside… Isn’t it a little bit dated to be reppin’ the College Dropout while touring in ’08?

How many dudes you know… wanna catch Scribe… not many… if any…

Nasty Nas bitches… Chea!!!

Also, fuck the canteen, i hear Jesus Walks no matter where i’m headed.

Eds Note: Check the quote/unquote “review” of the show.