Table Cockey


Although the game has very little in common with cock…

or hockey… it definitely involves a table.

That’s right friends, Table Cockey… and the game just got official.


  • Table. (preferably round, but whatever’s clever)
  • 10 bottlecaps per competitor. (not enough caps? get drinking)
  • Jack. (bottlecap coloured black)
  • Ability to flick said bottlecaps.

The game begins by placing the jack in the centre of the table.

Players then take turns to bust caps at each other, the objective is to be the closest to the jack at the end of the game, last-man-standing Gladiator style.

“are you not entertained? coz’ i’ll fk you up with a telephone”

Traditionally, the bottlecap is placed on the outside edge and flicked with a forefinger, however recent innovations in the game have seen new styles such as the up-flick and knuckle-puck bring intense new levels of excitement to the table.

(fast forward to the 3:14 mark for some knuckle-puck.)

Additionally, the competitor can elect to place the bottlecap upside down (for smoother, more accurate shots) or on its edges (for that hardbody slammin’ action), each to their own.

Table Cockey… its fun sober, and its even more fun wasted.

Plus, since all you really need is the ability to flick a bottlecap with precise accuracy, through a tabletop laden with the wreckage of your opponent’s bottlecaps, in order to be crowned champion, shit is easy.

For those in a celebratory or gambling mood, i suggest the inclusion of the ‘make it rain’ clause, whereby betting is incorporated. Everyone buys in before the game begins, 80 cent is a good round number, but it all has to be paid in 5 cent pieces. Put all the silver in a cup or something and then when the champ is crowned, they gets to make it rain!

(If you don’t know by now, Let Dallas and Rafi show you how.)

Play it with your friends, play it at bars, watch how people respond when you invite them to play some ‘cockey’… Even King Arthur was down.


One Response to “Table Cockey”

  1. Henry Says:

    The Olympic committee needs to be informed of this marvelous innovative game. Make it rain baby!

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