US Election


With the American election coming to a close[1] and the themocrats campaign becoming even more of a Stuart Diver style landslide victory, it now seems that Obama is ready to gank the big chair from BigDubbs George Double You Bush. With Biden seated comfortably at the lil kids table just a few doors down from the O office, John MacLane will hopefully Swayze into retirement and Palin will head back to Ass Fuck Alaska so lets hope that the wheels of political change can roll over like Biggie in his grave when Lil Wayne sold 500 billion copies of The Carter VII in like fuckin 20 minutes! Finger crossed X!

Now I doubt that we have any American readers as yet and what’s even more unlikely is that they read this blog looking for political guidance and or decent political commentary (for that I would hit up Politico or Washington Post or some shit), but just in case I thought I might take the opportunity to look at a few moments of the election that caught my attention and also to predict a few things that I’m hoping might happen.

John McCain – “She needed the clothes.” explaining to reporters why Sarah Palin spent $150,000 on clothes n shit.


•    After Obama’s inauguration party every themocrat will head to the after party, And after the party it’s the hotel lobby, And round bout 4 you got to clear the lobby etc etc (R.Kelly will not be attending as children may be present)
•    Barack’s top adviser David Axelrod will return to his successful career as 60’s & 70’s Jazz composer and music producer.
•    John McCain will co star with Bruce Willis in Die Hard 9 Fight For Freedom as John McLane Senior, a movie about an African American man with a middle eastern sounding name who takes over the white house but then gets blown up by the two patriotic terrorism fighting old men just before the credits roll then says “yippy kayay motherfucker!” (American flag waves in background)
•    Sarah Palin will do a double page spread in Playboy with Tina Fey then get a reoccurring role in 30 rock as Liz Lemon’s sister from out of town.
•    Jay-Z will use up most of the 74 minutes on The Blueprint 6 talking about how himself and Obama both came up out the hood and took shit over via crack rock.

I’m Prahly wrong about all of this shit but who really gives a fuck? Being Australian I can’t vote in this election anyway. Hope to see you at my Barack Obarbeque next week (BYO Drinks). Peace

[1] I may be calling this one a week early but seriously McCain? You fuckin’ kidding me? Dude looks like the very illegal love child of Walter Matthau and Mason Gamble from the 93′ classic Dennis the Menace.


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